The Decision To Elope
Elopement at Cannon Beach in Oregon
Lately, we have been hearing that more and more couples are considering making the bold move to elope. We couldn't be more thrilled that couples are wanting to take their wedding or elopement day into their own hands, and plan a ceremony that defines them! But with that, there can be an elephant in the room for some. It breaks our heart to know that some couples shy away from doing what inspires them, because they worry about hurting others.
"My partner and I really want to elope, but we are worried about what our families might say."
"The only reason why I am hesitant on eloping is because I know my family will be mad."
"I feel like I am being guilted into having a big wedding. If it were up to us, we would just elope."
Elopement in the Columbia River Gorge in Oregon
Take Control
It IS up to you, even if it may not always feel like it.
Maybe you + your partner are more introverted and don't necessarily want to be the center of attention, maybe you would rather save up for a road trip honeymoon or a trip to Iceland, perhaps your family dynamic isn't conductive to a stress-free wedding, maybe you just really want to get back to the root of why you are choosing to get married, and have a day that celebrates that! Whatever your reasoning, know that you do not owe anyone anything, except each other. Never let anyone make you feel like you are making the wrong choice.
One of the best ways to get off to a great start in your marriage is to keep in mind and make sure that this is about the two of you. You are electing to commit your lives and love to each other because YOU want to, not because other people have a say in what you do. Other people, family or not, shouldn't have a right over your wedding just like they don't get to determine if you're going to have kids, where you'll be living, what you decide to do in your free time.
A big reason for getting married is to celebrate and solidify your union in a way that makes sense to you + your partner, vs. society or other people’s expectations.
“My parents think by wanting to elope, we are being selfish.”
Sure, eloping can be “selfish”.
Wait, what?
There is a GOOD kind of selfish [although they may not see it that way]! Eloping is no more “selfish” than practicing self-care. Your relationship is yours, and if you choose to share those moments with others, that is completely up to you. A wedding or elopement ceremony can be an intimate event that no one else is entitled to if you don’t want them to be. You can elect to have a couple of close friends, or your parents, or your siblings present during your elopement. You can also elope just you + your partner. The decision is YOURS!
Eloping doesn’t mean you love your friends or family any less!
I’ll say it again.
Eloping does NOT MEAN you love your friends or family any less.
In choosing the elopement path, all you are asking of others is to support the two of you on getting married in a way that speaks to you. We think that is the opposite of being “bad selfish”.
Including Everyone!
Just because you decide to elope "just the two of you", doesn't mean that your family can't be included in different ways if you choose! If family is a big part of your life, there are many ways that they can help you celebrate, while still being supportive of your elopement decision. Sometimes this looks like:
-Skyping/FaceTiming family from your elopement spot after the ceremony!
-Having a reception at a later date, with family and friends.
-Include some family heirlooms or traditions during your elopement.
-Throw an engagement party or get-together beforehand!
-Having friends/family help with dress shopping, browsing Airbnbs, or chatting about hikes you'll take during your elopement trip!
Elopement at Joshua Tree National Park in California
Making The Leap
Dreaming of eloping with your partner in the Cascades, in the desert sun, next to a waterfall or in the Faroe Islands? Trust that instinct! We never want you to feel obligated to have a day that doesn't feel 100% YOU, especially not to appease someone else.
So you’ve decided to elope? Yay!! We are all about it!
What's the next step? send us a message! and we will gladly help you have the best elopement day possible!